One of the best things I could have possibly done for myself the day I asked my ex husband to leave was to get a therapist. If we’re really being honest, I called before he even got home. I’m blessed for a lot of things, one is my time as a military spouse. Because of that, I was able to use the benefits afforded to me through Military One Source and receive free counseling. Even if you’re not in a crisis situation, even if you just need another person to talk to, I highly recommend seeing a therapist.
You may wonder, just like I did, how I was going to make the time to see a therapist on a weekly basis, but let me tell you, technology is amazing. I see my therapist at 830pm on Wednesday nights from my couch, or my bed, or my car, you see, I see her virtually through the app Zoom.
What always surprises me about therapy, is you have an idea of what you think it’s going to be, you tell her what’s happened over the last two weeks, and you think you know what you want out of it, but it becomes a completely different outcome. I’ve grown so much as a person. I thought I needed someone to talk to about the changes in my life, turns out I needed someone to talk to about me. Someone to push me outside of my comfort zone, and to be able to recognize situations for what they are. I’m a chronic overthinker, still am, but now I recognize situations as they’re coming at me, and I have a better way of adapting to them.
I can’t tell you how many people I’ve talked to in the last few months who say how remarkably well I’m handling things, or how much grace I’ve walked through this season with. That’s not how I feel, each day has it’s own challenges, and I face them head on. But I can cope with them. And what’s even better, it’s not what has happened to me, it’s how I choose to live my life. If there’s anything I’ve discovered from this process, and anything my therapist has helped me find, it’s self worth. It’s knowing what I will and won’t accept. It’s learning to love me first. It’s a change. And it’s so much for the better.
I am so excited to step out and move forward. There’s so much more to life than focusing on one thing, and it’s all there waiting for you, you just have to see it.
If you’re having trouble or just need someone to talk to, I urge you, reach out, don’t be afraid of the stigma, go sit on their couch (or your own!).
xo, Emily
Classy, Sassy, and Bad Ass-y 